My Own Worst Enemy (Working Title)

My Own Worst Enemy

Violated by these vicious acts of supposed volition

Arrogance stowed away enacting this treason

Inside the subconscious, we’re unconsciously enslaved

There’s another’s Will pulling our reigns

Tearing through free will, telling us right from wrong

The Ego’s will is our muse’s song

A choral of wonderfully sinister animalistic tendencies

Hidden underneath dense hypocrisy

These loaded words are chambered with a cause

To protect ourselves from our petty foolishness and flaws

Mind’s searching through the dark for justification

To give meaning and significance to our existence

Unable to accept that we are just specks of dust

Traveling under the universe’s cusp

It’s the mind against the Ego

Arrogant, proud; yet feeble

To own our own decisions may be impossible

But understanding that our reality is

Interpreted by our Ego is the only option

Captain's Log #0043820

Star Date: Nebulos 34/09 
This is Captain Asher Noland of the Phygian Empire and Commander of the vessel Orion's Fury. I am broadcasting this message deep into outer space in the hopes that someone, anyone will be able to decrypt this signal and read the Captain's logs that follow.
We have just escaped a great attack on our home planet, Tarnasis, and I fear the worst has become of it. We are currently drifting somewhere amidst the Nu Scorpii star system. Our exact coordinates are still difficult to place. As our planet was engulfed in the flames of warfare I made a last, desperate, decision to use Orion's Fury's accelerated drive. A substantial amount of debris and echos have been confirmed near Tarnasis's star quadrant. This has led me to believe that our planet has been destroyed in the wake of our alien invaders. I have not informed anyone but vital staff at this time. 


Within the Log's that follow may very well be the last remnant of our civilization. Within these pages holds our's philosophies, our goods and our bads. Our Promise and our downfall. Perhaps someone will search among these words with an unbiased eye and see that we were a young and advanced people, yet our technology and intellect eventually became our crux. It was our insatiable lust for technology that has led us to this.


Take, for example, the vessel that I command. This ship is the culmination of all the knowledge we have on deep space travel. It is a civilian model of the military's Dorian class ship. This vessel's max occupancy is 250,000. And we currently have 180,000 on board. Orion's Fury is about 50,000 miles in perimeter and about 10,000 miles from the bow to the stern. Orion's Fury has minimal military capabilities including several hundred .80 millimeter cannons spaced evenly from the front of the ship to the back. There are also some rocket pads for short range missile defenses.


But the greatest part of this ship and a credit to the Phygian MIlitary is the Thermonuclear Translight engine; it is the only one of it's kind. The Translight engine makes light speed achievable, however at a great cost to the engine itself. When jumping to light speed the Translight engine begins burning fuel and nuclear atoms at an incredible temperature. (About the temperature of a star about to burn out.) At those temperatures the atoms begin separate and about 1000 nuclear explosions happen every minute in that we are in light speed. The engine itself is about 80 miles long. Upon exiting light speed the engine's need time to cool off. (About 2,000 years.) So right now we can only drift and wait for the auxiliary engine to be ready.


I will begin to scatter my logs throughout the universe and hope that someone can read our brave yet tragic story. 


Captain Noland.

Hive Mind

Stricken with the vanity

Of Mindless Materialism and profits

Has lead us into this insanity

Where this is just a game and we are all puppets

From golden idols of stardom

Sitting atop mountains of media sponsors

Anyone who buys is now a martyr

For they’re evil deeds and the petty monster

We’ve relinquished our consciousness

For the comfort of they’re acceptance

Mindfulness is something to miss

Now they have us trapped behind this material fence

Clothes and pastes are all you need

While gadgets will set your tone

If only we could see the corporate greed

They’re ulterior motives need only be known

To constrict the mind to simple thoughts

Has always been they’re intentions

The mind is now something that can be bought

With superficial inventions

The needs to be like everyone else

Is fabricated in Hollywood

This noose around our necks tighten like a belt

If only to escape, if only we could

To look inward and past the exterior

The abstract will destroy they’re plans

Our mind may be weak and weary

To think on our own and sift through the sands

Is all we need to break free

And realize what’s the mind’s eye can really see

Minimum Wage

I am simple appalled at the dismal state of minimum wage; it's just not going far enough. It's not good enough that families are struggling to support themselves. It's not good enough that people have to work 3 jobs to make ends meat. It's not good enough that people have to break they're back for pittance; they should also be breaking they're necks. Working highly stressful jobs with long hours and little pay is a step in the right direction but if we're going to oppress the poor we have to really get serious about this. (They're not going to oppress themselves, ya know.)

So here's my plan. First of all we need to really slash minimum wage. 7.25$ an hour? We can go lower then that can't we? I suggest a more modest amount like 2$ an hour.

Labor laws you say? Not with the power of waiver. See contracts are a sort of slavery. Already companies are having employees relinquish certain rights via contract waivers. Breaks, overtime, and unpaid wages can all be wiped away with a set of lawyers and a stroke of the proverbial pen. Companies are already using this contract system; so let's get this slave boat moving. Let's have them sign away minimum wage, holiday pay, and they're first born baby.

I also highly recommend targeting poor and high crime zones. See the more desperate the state of affairs, the more desperate the worker. They'll work for anything eventually. This has worked so well in places like Indonesia and China. And on top of making insane profits on the backs of slav- I mean workers, we'll also be looked upon as champions of industry, helping the lower class. In desperate situations anyone who is willing to take advantage of the less fortunate is always the hero. Because as we all know the best way to remedy a dismal economic situation is to pay as little as possible and put small business's out of work.

But why should we have all the fun. Once we have taken everything else we need to target hope. (I've heard hope is what people without money use as currency, I'm not sure though.) In any event hope can lead to raises and civil suits and unions and revolutions; everything we don't need. Since most of these jobs are customer service jobs, let's get the customers in on this. With all the money we saved from cutting salaries we can hire customers to make the workers lives more difficult. Have customers knock over drinks and cause messes that the workers, in-turn, have to clean. Hire customers to go into liquor stores and hassle the salesmen when he asks for ID.

These simple changes can really go far. Oppressing the poor is a difficult job but its an important one. We need poor people to collect our delicious, delicious money. So let's make sure we have poor people around for a long, long time. Now turn away I think I hear one coming.

The Importance of Being Ginger

So it has been brought to my attention that I am what is considered to be a "Ginger". For those of you who do not know what a Ginger is let me take this time to give a brief overview. A Ginger is someone with very pale skin, freckles, red hair, no soul, and a very large penis. I kid, I kid, I'm pretty sure we have souls. Although I'm not entirely sure. I might have lost my soul at that bar the other night much like what happens to my credit card (And Dignity). Anyway.

So what's it like to be a Ginger, you ask?

Well it's no walk in the park. First off I was not born a Ginger and I've only become a Ginger in the past couple of years. Before that I was a normal functioning member of society until G-Day. I was working at a gas station happy and content with my life thus far. Until a customer walked in and refused to be served by me because I was a "Ginger". I motioned to ask the man what this "Ginger" was, but he left in a fit of disgust. So I went home and did some research and watched the startling documentary of modern Ginger life in America. "Ginger Kids" was the name of the documentary; it was filmed by Matt Stone and Trey Parker. Long story short Gingers are not born Gingers we are ascribed this position in life by a social construct.

But now I've been thrust into this life of a Ginger in society. Being a Ginger is particular because Gingers are defined by what we are not. And what we are not is white. Yes, we may be pale, or perhaps clear, (Depending on the severity of Gingerlyness) but we are not white. Gingers are even scoffed at by other white people. Gingers are not accepted by any other social circle but other Ginger people. This is unfortunate because we are a kind and gentle people. We can offer others stronger sunblock and haircare products. (Oh and theres a slim chance that we can make children that also have red hair) If only we could break these social barriers down. (Like a Ginger Reagan) 

Although the social barriers for Gingers are stark we find a way to live. We just try to go about our days like any other person. We have jobs and pale families. We go swimming and biking. We sleep and have super powers, just like everyone else. If only we could see how much we have in common maybe we could learn to love one another. Red and white and black and yellow and pale hands, clinched together in a sign of unity. (But not too hard; might leave a mark)